Thursday, February 19, 2004
Life seems like a dream right now. Yeserday i took a step back from life. Thought of this scenario of what would i do if had cancer or some shit. Hmm I most likely wont tell my parents. Might work for awhile and then quit.. lock myself in my room. Send smses to everyone on my phone list saying how great they have been. Go on IRC and tell everyone they have been the great friends. Tell my blood brother, Mark that too bad it didnt work out that i was to die in Scotland as we planned. And wen my cash runs out my handphone n Internet connections are cut i'll probably stay at home most of the time. Just counting the days to the end... Probablly die alone on my bed. When my parents find it itd be too late. I dont think id go fer any treatment either.. not when wat i want is so close. Hmmm but tats just a thought... don't even know if it'll happen. What else is there in my life to look forward to? If i'm gone will anyone weep for me? perhaps.... but well no one really needs me right now so i'm expendable. Why was i even born in the first place? I don't know. Most likely cus its tradition to have a child wen u get married in the 60s... not becos anyone loved me. Its nice to see people have someone to love on the streets. I feel sorry for those whove been cheated in the end thinking that something is love. Love shouldnt be a short term thing.. when you love someone... youd better really mean it cos the other person mite be tat one person in your entire life you truely cares for you. There are no such things as trying in a relationship... only do or do not. The sadness of a love thats lost will only scar your heart and bleed your soul.... well time ta go... wonder if im gona get back home alive...

-Talon faced death at 8:10 AM

--